Monkey business

macacoscronicaAlan & Erik Sklar
para português, clique aqui.


the monkeys came today but we had no bananas, we had mandarin oranges, so i threw them two sections they do not like mandarin oranges it is apparently an acquired taste for these banana eaters—after ten minutes of rejecting the acidic smell two of the adults bothered to taste it—discovering that they were sweet the two grabbed the two sections and hit the trees to relish the citric sweetness without sharing—so the others waited to see what was next on the menu—apple now i don’t know if monkeys eat apple, but cutting two slices of a tart, sweet apple was introduced to their consciousness—two of them imbibed in the sweet tartness and once learning that apples are good to eat—i threw another two slices and the same two pounced and retired to the branches to enjoy the apple tart—having no more fruit everyone retired to watching the World Cup. (AES a.k.a. Alan Sklar)


Everyone retired except the two monkeys with the newly obtained taste of apple and mandarin.

No, those two went on to brutally rob hundreds of unsuspecting families of their household goods.

In the monkeys quest to satisfy the insatiable desire to consume citrus and sweet apple flesh, they managed to set in motion a chain of events which would invariably lead to the downfall of the Brazilian socioeconomic structure.

Which, having already been weakened in the face of poorly planned international spectacles, was toppled quite easily by the two monkeys.

That was the day that the one known as AES Brazil became the sole underlord of the Brazilian tree mammals.

It started off as simple fruit robbery, but then AES started introducing the monkeys to alcohol, LSD, and PCP…

As the monkeys taste grew broader their addictions became insatiable.

And just as the British had done to the Chinese with opium, so too had AES gained control of the monkeys.

First an apple to set Brazil ablaze, then the narcotics to bring the South America to its knees.

Drug addicted monkeys made their way North once Brazil and Chile fell…

We’ve held them along the Southern borders of Nicaragua… but they keep coming.

All we know of AES is that he sits atop a mountain in the Brazilian jungle… continuously introducing the monkeys to experimental substances, observing their behavior, refining his absolute control, pushing human civilization as we know it closer and closer to the brink of destitution.

The only solution of course is Regicide.

Though the solution is intangible… it is too late.

Enter the epic of the food and drug crazed, tree dwelling monkeys.

Exit the longstanding epic of art and of culture, of human accomplishment, of interstellar exploration, of math, of botony, of contrived science…

All because of half of an apple, and a tiny little orange.

All because of the time and patience of the one we know of as AES. (Erik Sklar)


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *